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Walmart | Seamus O'Sparks

Tag: Walmart

Question About Wal*Mart….

By Seamus O'Sparks on April 19, 2017 — 1 min read

I had a terrible stink on me yesterday. At first it was tolerable-I’d say a level 2 stink. But then I went to Walgreens and holy balls. I had stink on my stink. Here’s the weird part: it seemed to be a situational stink. Outside of Walgreens, it was a natural stink…a nice stink even.... More

I just enjoyed one of those minor, but fun, Facebook dust ups

By Seamus O'Sparks on October 12, 2016 — 1 min read

I just enjoyed one of those minor, but fun, Facebook dust ups. Someone posted a clip of Jon Stewart weighing in on obstructionist politics. One of the comments below the post was, and I’m directly quoting here, “Fuck that Jew.” One thing lead to another and I ended up suggesting to the “Fuck that Jew”... More

I must say, the positive response generated by MY beard and MY glasses have exceeded MY wildest expectations

By Seamus O'Sparks on September 20, 2016 — 1 min read

I must say, the positive response generated by MY beard and MY glasses have exceeded MY wildest expectations. They have won me the adoration of women and the envy of men. I can’t tell you how many offers I get from movie producers (several of them pornographic) appealing to me for an appearance in their... More

WARNING-LONG POST-EPIC ADVENTURE-ALL WORDS-NO PICS-ALL SQUIRT AND NO JUICE MAKES CORY MANN A RANDY BOY

By Seamus O'Sparks on September 5, 2016 — 1 min read

WARNING-LONG POST-EPIC ADVENTURE-ALL WORDS-NO PICS-ALL SQUIRT AND NO JUICE MAKES CORY MANN A RANDY BOY (and a deadly aim)…Words used to make the nut, before Wal-Mart and Instagram…Gadzooks! Chasca had a SUPERSTENTIAL TIME out west this Labor Day weekend! Thanks to Lost Horse Saloon in Marfa, and The Deadhorse in San Angelo for having us... More

In these hairy times, wouldn’t it be nice to have something positive and reliable to embrace?

By Seamus O'Sparks on July 28, 2016 — 1 min read

In these hairy times, wouldn’t it be nice to have something positive and reliable to embrace? How many times do you find yourself saying, “If only there were something I could turn to for comfort and relief.” Well, now there is: PORN. That’s right: PORN. For relaxing and restoring; ever buoyant never boring, it’s PORN.... More

Tonight! US! The Blackheart!!! U.T. WON!!!!

By Seamus O'Sparks on October 10, 2015 — 1 min read

Tonight! US! The Blackheart!!! U.T. WON!!!! We play at Midnight-come let your inner SWAIN out…sex in the restroom will happen…Who has sex anymore? Who has sex any less? Let’s make a porn in the bathroom and sell it to the North Koreans…Seriously, people-it’s all about the hedonism…the Epicurean-the prick, the tits, the delightful and charming…... More

I AM WOMAN-PAY ME MORE!?!?!

By Seamus O'Sparks on September 19, 2015 — 2 mins read

I AM WOMAN-PAY ME MORE!?!?! Long post warning I like women. They’re neat. Sometimes I wear their clothes. I definitely try to get “weird” and “diabolical” with them as often as possible. WOMEN-I salute you. I say all of this because I just saw a report on KXAN about women not getting paid as much... More

My friend, Evan Gemmel, has a new record coming out

By Seamus O'Sparks on July 20, 2015 — 1 min read

My friend, Evan Gemmel, has a new record coming out. Please listen to the link and help fund some good music! Don’t let it all be Wal*Mart and Disney and the new 1,000 year reich…Seriously, support new music and help artists gain traction or quit bitching about the government and society and how much things... More

WHERE HAVE YOU GONE JOE DIMAGGIO? WHAT ABOUT YOU, MUHAMMAD ALI?

By Seamus O'Sparks on June 30, 2015 — 1 min read

Oh man, I get to get away from it all in about 20 mins. I can’t wait. I’m not going very far, but the point is: I’M GOING. And I haven’t “gone” in a long time. Too long. My nerves are all raw ground beef from the daily rounds of customer service/music swindle. So, I’m... More

Sometimes, when you HAVE to write to industry people to try and get them to come see your little show, you have fun with it.

By Seamus O'Sparks on June 17, 2015 — 2 mins read

WARNING-LONG POST AHEAD! Sometimes, when you HAVE to write to industry people to try and get them to come see your little show, you have fun with it. Only the Good Die Weird/Rock vs The Victory Culture Hi (name withheld), My name is J.T. Martin. I am the singer/flautist for the band Chasca. I believe... More