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In these hairy times, wouldn’t it be nice to have something positive and reliable to embrace? | Seamus O'Sparks

In these hairy times, wouldn’t it be nice to have something positive and reliable to embrace?

By Seamus O'Sparks on July 28, 2016 — 1 min read

In these hairy times, wouldn’t it be nice to have something positive and reliable to embrace? How many times do you find yourself saying, “If only there were something I could turn to for comfort and relief.” Well, now there is: PORN. That’s right: PORN. For relaxing and restoring; ever buoyant never boring, it’s PORN. So next time you feel stressed or low, turn off that television and say, “HEY MOM, GIVE US PORN.” That’s right, PORN. De stress , make a mess-PASS THE PORN AND HONK YOUR HORN!!! PORN…
brought to you by citizens who believe that porn actually has more value now than politics or wal*mart or pop music…

Posted in: Random

The Story of Seamus

Seamus O'Sparks is the seventh son of a Seventh Day Adventist who went on a seven-day bender starting on July 7, 1977 at a strip club called Seventh Heaven at the corner of 7th St. and 7th Ave. in the West Village.