Just saw the fuzz take down a perp at the McDonald’s By Seamus O'Sparks on February 14, 2017 — 1 min read Just saw the fuzz take down a perp at the McDonald’s on 123. I asked one of the cops if they had finally caught The Hamburglar? They didn’t acknowledge me. I lit a cigarette and asked if the suspect had tried to robble robble the joint. One of the cops whacked a billy club in... More
Sorry to bug everyone By Seamus O'Sparks on March 19, 2014 — 1 min read Sorry to bug everyone. I got bored with the vodka thing, but I’m not sure I’m-you know-all done. you know-like there’s still stuff stirring up inside of me. It’s funny-it’s a funny feeling. I think I’m going to go have a delightful breakfast(no grapes), listen to some Foreigner(nothing after 4), and be back in a... More
I have drank so much vodka this morning By Seamus O'Sparks on March 19, 2014 — 1 min read I have drank so much vodka this morning that I can’t even feel my swollen throbbing epiglottis. Everyone else is not as good at drinking vodka than me. More
verything everybody posts today I am going to comment on and tie it into drinking vodka By Seamus O'Sparks on March 19, 2014 — 1 min read Warning: everything everybody posts today I am going to comment on and tie it into drinking vodka. Health, politics, family, music, sex, vodka-you name it; it’s going to have a vodka comment BY ME on it. That’s my new thing. That and drinking lots of vodka… More
You know those mornings when you wake up? By Seamus O'Sparks on August 10, 2011 — 1 min read You know those mornings when you wake up? You wake up and you grab a smoke and you take a shot of vodka. And you curse and kick and deal with a rogue stomach. And you smoke and you take another drink of vodka and you say, “Everybody but me is flawed.” Robble, robble, robble… More
After a night of uneasy dreams By Seamus O'Sparks on June 24, 2011 — 1 min read After a night of uneasy dreams I awoke this morning to find that I had transformed into a giant insect-like creature. This was so disturbing that I immediately went to a strip club to anneal my psychic sores. My presence caused such a disturbance that the strippers began to throw apples at me. I noticed... More
I drink a lot By Seamus O'Sparks on February 25, 2011 — 1 min read I drink a lot. I drink vodka every morning that my gut feels sour. And my gut always feels sour. This morning was no different except that I took Rod Stewart out to breakfast. Rod’s all spit and no balls these days. He kept winking at me and asking me to cut his steak. He... More