As I was walking home last night I cut through the cemetery

By Seamus O'Sparks on February 6, 2013 — 1 min read

As I was walking home last night I cut through the cemetery. I was shocked to find a statue that was built over 100 years ago and dedicated to my memory. It lauded me for being a champion of the young and the last surviving neanderthal. That explains the green eyes and ginger tinge to my hair. It also explains my malformed hyoid and brachiocephallic desgin. ~ylf deye der ta acsahc yadrutas siht~And now I can rest easy at all those nights I spent behaving like a gibbering brute. I also know why everytime I visit the Levant I am harrangued with cries of, “Nephilim!” I enjoyed breeding with those sapien chicks. I really did. So I am a relic hominid. So what? Who are you? Homo Sapien Sapien. Good ole’ man “The double wise?” What a double disappointment. NAH, JUST KIDDING MY FRIENDS. I love you all!!!! You modern men may have invented the catapult, but we neanderthaloids invented good natured joshing….And drugs. OH yeah, the stone age ROCKED!!!THIS POST BROUGHT TO YOU BY WAL-MART

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The Story of Seamus

Seamus O'Sparks is the seventh son of a Seventh Day Adventist who went on a seven-day bender starting on July 7, 1977 at a strip club called Seventh Heaven at the corner of 7th St. and 7th Ave. in the West Village.