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OH MY GOD! | Seamus O'Sparks


By Seamus O'Sparks on May 9, 2015 — 1 min read

OH MY GOD! I just heard the news that the AMERICANS are going to INVADE TEXAS! But I live in Texas? Which is also America (United States of)? Zuh?…and now I see it (FLASHING LIGHTS) Wowzer-those sneaky pukes! I don’t think history has ever seen such a cunning tactic employed with respect to a SURPRISE attack. Odysseus, eat your puny heart out: The U.S. annexes Texas, lulling us treacherously into a false sense of security. Then, after 170 years, it’s- heh-heh-heh-SUCK THIS TEJAS! Now kneel before ZOD! Who saw that coming? Not me…Not Kenny Rogers. Damn Sam, caught with our pants down-which is the best way to get caught if you ask me… Hate the game, not the player I suppose…So, I for one would like to welcome our new American overlords. As a bespectacled and highly, highly respected member of the arts/music community, I can be useful in rounding up others…WELOCME IMPERIALIST YANKEES! btw-if you are from Texas and really believe that the Americans are going to invade, I want to get together with you and drink Lone Star and hold hands and write weird emails to Don Henley ask each other questions and wear each others clothes…

Posted in: Random

The Story of Seamus

Seamus O'Sparks is the seventh son of a Seventh Day Adventist who went on a seven-day bender starting on July 7, 1977 at a strip club called Seventh Heaven at the corner of 7th St. and 7th Ave. in the West Village.