Published! By Seamus O'Sparks on November 2, 2017 — 1 min read Thanks everyone for the Bday wishes! Much <3 to you all. And here’s another miracle: my first article ever has been published in Action Magazine! It’s my degenerate piece on SXSW. Thanks Sam Kindrick for taking a chance on a chronic ne’er do well! The piece is being run in two installments. Click this link... More
Urban Cowboy Progeny By Seamus O'Sparks on October 27, 2017 — 1 min read Just imagine: if Bud and Pam had made a go of it and produced offspring, the chin dimple on that little bastard would have been UNSTOPPABLE…could catch a bullet in that thing. More
Oh Say Can You Kneel: All mouth and no soul, welcome to the new American way By Seamus O'Sparks on September 27, 2017 — 4 mins read The Facebook has been burning the laughing fire over this football-kneeling-national anthem imbroglio. And man do I love it! Threads filled with screaming human drama; opinions hurled, feelings hurt, teeth bared-heads up. It’s definitely what I signed up for when I slithered on to this toxic piece of 21st century Neverland called social media. It... More
Parenthood By Seamus O'Sparks on September 23, 2017 — 1 min read In fact, I love my children so much I decided to spare them the hassles, horrors, and humbug of life by not conceiving them. I’m freakin parent of the millennium over here 😁 More
Jeepers, it’s a troubled and tremulous world out there By Seamus O'Sparks on September 21, 2017 — 1 min read Jeepers, it’s a troubled and tremulous world out there. I don’t care what the signs say anywhere, in the interest of my own peace of mind I am going to conceal carry my penis from now on. I don’t want to be having breakfast when some satyr/nymph type shows up looking to make mischief. NOT... More
Here Comes the Scum: Notes on a job search By Seamus O'Sparks on September 18, 2017 — 4 mins read I set out running but I’ll take my time A friend of the Devil is a friend of mine I was running late and pushing 80 miles an hour heading towards Bastrop. John Lennon screamed at me through a busted speaker about how we all shine on. Maybe, some of us do, but not me.... More
Well, I have some bad news By Seamus O'Sparks on September 12, 2017 — 1 min read Well, I have some bad news. My book, “Women are from Venus-I’m Caligula” will not be coming out. A couple of things happened. First, the publishers Googled Caligula. Then they read the book. I received a distressing call from them accusing me of turpitude and telling me that the deal was off. I told them... More
Well, I am very excited By Seamus O'Sparks on September 7, 2017 — 1 min read Well, I am very excited. Not only did I get some poems published in Adelaide Literary Magazine this month, but I have a new book coming out in October. It’s a self-help/relationship guide type thing based on my own fractured experiences as a swinging dude with weird notions who has had many, many, many lovers…many.... More
I was arguing with my neighbor about why I was better than all that when I got struck by an epiphany… By Seamus O'Sparks on May 6, 2017 — 1 min read …or an Epipen…or a pen knife. Doesn’t matter, they came at me and I prevailed. After the dust-up, I had a moment of clarity. It’s funny what we humans choose to fight over. We’re pretty calm when dealing with someone who doesn’t cotton to objective truth. Dig this, if you say “the sky is blue”... More
Autumn Bottom – Golden Years My Ass By Seamus O'Sparks on April 29, 2017 — 1 min read I was at the eye doctor the other day. I was diagnosed with presbyopia. I’ve always felt uncomfortable around Presbyterians but I was shocked to learn that I have a fear of them. I had no idea optometry could diagnose such things. I guess the doc could see disdain for Presbyterians in my eyes…. I... More