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movies | Seamus O'Sparks

Tag: movies

I hope you all like classic movies because I finally put my stinky finger on something

By Seamus O'Sparks on October 9, 2016 — 1 min read

I hope you all like classic movies because I finally put my stinky finger on something. In the midst of this most recent vulva jockeying episode of, “As The Trump Turns” it occurs to me who the GOP candidate resembles. The hairpin personality turns, the jigsaw oratory,the grandiose schematics-there’s only one character who straws that... More

Here’s why going to the movies sucks

By Seamus O'Sparks on December 18, 2015 — 1 min read

Here’s why going to the movies sucks: while all of you were going to see Star Wars last night, I went to go see “In the Heart of the Sea.” Everyone was at the cinema dressed as their favorite Star Wars character-which is fine. Apparently it is not fine for ME to come dressed as... More

Who IS Seamus O Sparks?

By Seamus O'Sparks on November 25, 2013 — 1 min read

Who IS Seamus O Sparks? What kind of bats are buzzing around his belfry? I was given the number 9. I love movies about cavemen, inbreds, and cannibals. I hope they make a movie about inbred cavemen cannibals soon. The most interesting dream I ever had: I was a soldier in Vietnam. We were walking... More

October is a spooky creepy time of year

By Seamus O'Sparks on October 3, 2011 — 1 min read

October is a spooky creepy time of year. I just watched the movie, “Eden Lake.” Jeepers! I’m terrified of the English now. I used to love them-now they give me the shivers. The movie scared me so bad that I can’t even listen to my Supertramp records. Can anyone help me? Does anyone know an... More

I was watching The Lord of the Rings movie

By Seamus O'Sparks on August 9, 2011 — 1 min read

I was watching The Lord of the Rings Movie-one of them-last night. And I was like, “Shucks, I don’t remember any of this from the book.”It was much more violent for one thing. It was also not how I envisioned the characters at all. More nudity and “adult situations than I remembered the book having.... More

I was at the bar last night and they showed that movie Rudy

By Seamus O'Sparks on May 25, 2011 — 1 min read

I was at the bar last night and they showed that movie Rudy. It’s about this guy that goes to Notre Dame and plays football. I cried and cried and cried and the whole bar laughed at me and I got sick to my stomach and hid in the bathroom. It was like losing my... More

I just saw that movie, The Human Centipede

By Seamus O'Sparks on May 23, 2011 — 1 min read

I just saw that movie, The Human Centipede. I was so glad to see that that had happened to somebody else. So now I have been part of A Human Centipede, a Human Millipede, A Human Mosquito Hawk, A Human Apollo Creed, A Bear Centipede, A Bear Man, A Human Centi-Swede, The Human League, A... More