Something Spindly Ran across My Naked Foot
I don’t fear not being able to sleep
Nor do I fear thinking the downward thoughts
Even the real crazy ones
For instance:
I don’t fear considering the arrival of the Anti-Christ
But this is largely because the Jews (whom I like)
Are still in business
That tribe made short, brutal work
Of the last person with the surname of Christ
Who came around sniffing for trouble
The Romans lent a helping hand…plenty of them still around too
So I don’t fear staying up late with the clammy sweats
While my head scrutinizes the coming of the Anti-Christ
With a dark eye
The Anti-Christ will be just another bear with a sore head to deal with
And the New World Order will be just another reason to shop at Wal*Mart
And an asteroid colliding with Earth will be just another excuse to get drunk
So I don’t fear these things
And I don’t fear death or Disneyland or stains in my shorts pesto in my smile swarthy foreigners public toilets Korean food poverty addressing large crowds meaninglessness theocracies indie rock sex with psychotic women working soulless jobs ego loss weight gain old age young pukes slim luck fat chance or another ice age
Spiders, on the other hand…
Spiders scare the shit out of me