Warning: Use of undefined constant DATABASE_SERVER - assumed 'DATABASE_SERVER' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/wjl7ay88puji/domains/seamus.wileykoepp.com/html/wp-config.php on line 32
Thanks for nothing, Facebook | Seamus O'Sparks

Thanks for nothing, Facebook

By Seamus O'Sparks on February 17, 2016 — 1 min read

Thanks for nothing, Facebook. I pitched a sincere plea for help with my Witch’s Teat issue and all I got were a lot of cute jabs for my sincerity. Some friends you all are. I have a Witch’s Teat. And for that I’m now a figure of fun. That’s just sad. They say that Sir Francis Drake had a Witch’s Teat. The Spanish took the piss out of him too. Now their Armada’s gathering barnacles. You have another thing coming if you think you can pull the ole’ Giles Corey on me. Maledicta Antiquis…Oh, and for any of you swingers out there: do you think my Witch’s Teat will negatively impact my lifestyle? I think it makes me look cool.

Posted in: Random

The Story of Seamus

Seamus O'Sparks is the seventh son of a Seventh Day Adventist who went on a seven-day bender starting on July 7, 1977 at a strip club called Seventh Heaven at the corner of 7th St. and 7th Ave. in the West Village.