There’s trouble abroad, domestic rancor, unpredictable weather patterns-basically, business as usual on planet Earth

There’s trouble abroad, domestic rancor, unpredictable weather patterns-basically, business as usual on planet Earth. BUT-in San Marcos Texas, we’re chugging along. We’re the fastest growing city in America! And, thanks to the CHASCA EFFECT, we’re also the city with the weirdest and loosest morals since St. Paul straightened out those tosspot Corinthians. That’s right: we have dope rings and sodomites and public orgies and genital gnomes and a flea problem and witchcraft and Moloch and leeches and huxom priestesses and thunderstorms and an escarpment and urgent pleas from Jimmy Carter and satyrs and Frankensteins and Fruit Brute and disapproval from The Vatican and even a statue of Keith Moon. And we like it this way. In fact, don’t tell anyone, but, Hotel California was based on life in San Marcos TX. Yeah, and Don Henley came here to party once but he left in a melancholy state and claimed the town was, “too real.”