There’s something about what consumer culture does to the countenance

By Seamus O'Sparks on June 6, 2013 — 1 min read

There’s something about what consumer culture does to the countenance. I have seen some of the most gnarled and gnarly faces made in the name of humping the ultimate bargain out of somebody. But today I saw what had to be the most revolting and honest expression of the toll the free market system takes on the human spirit. The shop was full of little buggering demons all day. They swarmed the place like smacking stinky badgers in a demented bee colony. It was all hissing and fangs and need need need and blood in the water and honey on the cock. And of course, those long wrinkled fang jutting visages. Madness in the marketplace. It always eats me up. And then I saw it. As I passed by the window I looked up and saw THAT FACE. The worst face I ever seen. Bloodshot eyes, gross underbite, thin matted hair, a heavy brow and a roiling expression that reeked of suicide. I was shocked. Because the face belonged to me…

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The Story of Seamus

Seamus O'Sparks is the seventh son of a Seventh Day Adventist who went on a seven-day bender starting on July 7, 1977 at a strip club called Seventh Heaven at the corner of 7th St. and 7th Ave. in the West Village.