Rod Stewart’s at it again. He came over last night and his arse was filled with napalm. He told me that transcendental poetry was a bunch of hooey. I asked him what he thought of Walt Whitman. He said “Whitman couldn’t find kicks in a football(English) match!” I told him that Oscar Wilde kissed Whitman. He came at me with a can of Lysol. Then we kissed. I then wept. Then we prank called Don Henley.
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